002

[forceofnature]

[voice, public]
[Viridi has learned her lesson.

...Well no she hasn't she never does, but she can at least recognize the fact that the people here were too stupid to be expected to understand why gods needed to communicate the way they did.  Or how, exactly, this sort of communication worked. 

The telepathic broadcast is once again aimed to everyone within the city.  Instead of ringing directly in the ears of the unwashed masses, though, it seems to be reverberating from their communications devices instead.  There's an oddly echoing quality to it, and they'll find that her voice is impossible to shut off through the COMP, but hey.  She tried.]

So.

You've all been busy.  Paying visits to the mysterious 'Velvet Room', huh?

I couldn't help but notice that you're all practically lining up out the door to do favors for some strangers you don't know from Adam.  I'd call it altruistic, but we all know you're just hoping to get some shiny trinkets out of it.  A new weapon here, a better Persona there...  Call me crazy, but it's almost like you're making offerings in the hopes of receiving a blessing from some higher power you're pretty sure is benevolent.  Isn't it weird how familiar that sounds?  And you know, come to think of it, I could use a spare hand for some fetch quests, too.  Since you're all just so eager to be helpful, I'm sure you have time to spare.

Of course, I don't need anyone's faith, but a few favors here and there might just mean some handy-dandy divine intervention in your future.  I'm a goddess of my word.

You can even ask Pit!  My Treasure Hunt board had the ideal balance of difficulty to reward.  Palutena's was the lamest thing ever and Hades basically made his for sadists.  So act fast!  Once I've got what I want, you're just plain old out of luck.

Comments

[electricyousei]

"Most of that happened 100 years before I was born on my world. I guess I could find some old video clips on that, but they tended to use media that didn't survive long times back then."

[forceofnature]

Oh.

...

You can at least pretend to look sad, you know.

[electricyousei]

"I'd rather be involved in the repairs to the damage. Feeling sad because idiots did horrible things in the past won't fix it. This... Is probably why that was a bad task for me. I really only have one regret."

[forceofnature]

Oh, the dismemberment of sharks and rhinoceroses and tigers for 'medicine' in the east, right?! I know, it's just horrible.

[electricyousei]

"What's a rhinoceros?"

[forceofnature]

...

Ugh. They're probably already extinct anyway. Murderers.

[electricyousei]

"I wasn't trained in zoology. Really I have to rely on Omoikane for most of my natural information."

[forceofnature]

Don't worry. You can just wait until humans have successfully eradicated every other living thing on the planet; I'm sure it won't take much longer.

[electricyousei]

"I'm actually told that given the state of my world, doing that is an actual crime as they want to repair the ecological damage. I know I wasn't punished when I dealt with the people over fishing the trout in the river by where I grew up, and I dealt with them by making them not exist to any computer."

[forceofnature]

...OK, look, when I say things like that, the right response is, 'gee viridi i'm so sorry for your loss'.

[electricyousei]

"I see. I'm sorry for your loss."

[forceofnature]

Thank you.

Black rhinoceroses were my 14,678th favorite species, alright?

Trout is further down the list a little, but good for you anyway.

[electricyousei]

"I like fish. Sometimes more than people."

[forceofnature]

Oh, humans are definitely down near the ten millions. You beat out bubonic plague and leprosy, I think. I haven't consulted my list in a while.

[electricyousei]

"I see. I think the bubonic plague was treated though, but I may be wrong."

[forceofnature]

That doesn't mean there's not still some strains alive out there.

...Anyway. How did we get into this stuff again?

[electricyousei]

"We were discussing ulterior motives and offerings and it went down this path."

[forceofnature]

Right.

So the point is, you scratch my back, I scratch yours. ...Figuratively speaking. Massages aren't one of the rewards I'm offering.

[electricyousei]

"I don't mind gathering information for you."

[forceofnature]

That's the spirit!

Alright, I've already sent someone to investigate the Mictlan, so you can do some demon scouting. Report back with profiles on five different monster types, and I'll see what I can do about a first-tier reward of some sort.

[electricyousei]

"What do you want in a profile other than a description?"

[forceofnature]

Anything that strikes you as important. Attacks, weaknesses... Stuff they leave lying around.

[electricyousei]

"I'll see what I can uncover from behind the Nadesico's distortion field then."

[forceofnature]

Really? You're going to sit in your ship and hope it can analyze the things wandering around outside?

[electricyousei]

"That's why I'm in the park where there is the highest concentration of them out at night. That's also why I'm trying to tap into the local data network to get more eyes on the ground."