QUEEN SASSMOUTH (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
tyrantball) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
compnetwork2013-03-25 11:40 am
tyrantball) wrote in compnetwork2013-03-25 11:40 am
Video post to the public network
The feed snaps on to once again reveal Desco, although she's nowhere near as upset as the last time.
"Hello! Desco here!"
She briefly clears her throat before launching into her - obviously rehearsed - spiel.
"Desco was thinking about what she could do to fix all the incredibly obvious problems with humanity's political model, and she eventually decided to start small! Progress starts at the bottom and works its way upwards, you know. Just like how a hero starts off grinding on slimes in the starting area!"
She nods to herself, obviously proud of her BRILLIANT AND TOTALLY RELEVANT METAPHOR.
"So today, Desco is going to deliver a public service announcement to allll of Hinoto-Ri!"
With that, she holds up a crayon drawing of what looks like...a penguin?
"This is a Prinny! They are from Desco's home of Hades! They are a very important part of the industrial complex there!"
She tosses the drawing over her shoulder, smiling broadly.
"Desco has recently figured out that there is a deplorable lack of knowledge about Prinnies, so she has decided to educate you on them! And lucky for you, Desco is a highly-paid teacher at Evil Academy, the greatest school in the Netherworld!"
A slight pause.
"Also, in case you can't figure it out, Desco is also indulging in needless self-promotion while delivering this message. If you are struck by how amazing Desco is, she is still accepting minion applications!"
A broad smile as she holds up another piece of paper, this time with her contact number directly scribbled in crayon on it.
"Prinnies are sinful human souls! In life, they were terrible people that were complete failures as human beings! When they died, they went directly to Hades, where they were encased in Prinny Hide and subjected to intense, borderline sadistic lessons in order to become fine Prinnies!"
She pauses briefly in order to allow the the viewers to digest this message. She holds up the sign with her contact number again while she's at it.
"Once the training is finished, the Prinnies are shipped out to Netherworlds all over the universe, where they do menial labor and other degrading, thankless chores in exchange for less than minimum wage! When they have saved up enough money, they can pay off their sins and Death will take them away to be reincarnated!"
Her demeanor suddenly becomes serious.
"And now, Desco reaches the public service portion. Recently, Prinnies have started appearing in Hinoto-Ri during the Thirteenth Hour, and they are taking this time to slack off and indulge in idle chatter and frequent cigarette breaks. This is no good at all! A Prinny that is slacking off in his free time will soon start to slack off when working, and if a Prinny doesn't work his sins will never be forgiven! Therefore, if you see a Prinny during the Thirteenth Hour, Desco implores you to BRUTALLY ASSAULT them, for the sake of their tarnished souls!"
...she is entirely serious about this.
"Please, please, keep the cycle of reincarnation going! Beat a Prinny today!"
"Hello! Desco here!"
She briefly clears her throat before launching into her - obviously rehearsed - spiel.
"Desco was thinking about what she could do to fix all the incredibly obvious problems with humanity's political model, and she eventually decided to start small! Progress starts at the bottom and works its way upwards, you know. Just like how a hero starts off grinding on slimes in the starting area!"
She nods to herself, obviously proud of her BRILLIANT AND TOTALLY RELEVANT METAPHOR.
"So today, Desco is going to deliver a public service announcement to allll of Hinoto-Ri!"
With that, she holds up a crayon drawing of what looks like...a penguin?
"This is a Prinny! They are from Desco's home of Hades! They are a very important part of the industrial complex there!"
She tosses the drawing over her shoulder, smiling broadly.
"Desco has recently figured out that there is a deplorable lack of knowledge about Prinnies, so she has decided to educate you on them! And lucky for you, Desco is a highly-paid teacher at Evil Academy, the greatest school in the Netherworld!"
A slight pause.
"Also, in case you can't figure it out, Desco is also indulging in needless self-promotion while delivering this message. If you are struck by how amazing Desco is, she is still accepting minion applications!"
A broad smile as she holds up another piece of paper, this time with her contact number directly scribbled in crayon on it.
"Prinnies are sinful human souls! In life, they were terrible people that were complete failures as human beings! When they died, they went directly to Hades, where they were encased in Prinny Hide and subjected to intense, borderline sadistic lessons in order to become fine Prinnies!"
She pauses briefly in order to allow the the viewers to digest this message. She holds up the sign with her contact number again while she's at it.
"Once the training is finished, the Prinnies are shipped out to Netherworlds all over the universe, where they do menial labor and other degrading, thankless chores in exchange for less than minimum wage! When they have saved up enough money, they can pay off their sins and Death will take them away to be reincarnated!"
Her demeanor suddenly becomes serious.
"And now, Desco reaches the public service portion. Recently, Prinnies have started appearing in Hinoto-Ri during the Thirteenth Hour, and they are taking this time to slack off and indulge in idle chatter and frequent cigarette breaks. This is no good at all! A Prinny that is slacking off in his free time will soon start to slack off when working, and if a Prinny doesn't work his sins will never be forgiven! Therefore, if you see a Prinny during the Thirteenth Hour, Desco implores you to BRUTALLY ASSAULT them, for the sake of their tarnished souls!"
...she is entirely serious about this.
"Please, please, keep the cycle of reincarnation going! Beat a Prinny today!"
[Video] [Private]
"Really, Uncle Otoha? But Desco had to tell you what Prinnies were. Does that mean you have something like Prinnies in your world?"
<--THE POINT----
DESCO'S HEAD
no subject
[He holds the amulet up.]
Karas are chosen by the will of the city - one for each city. We keep the balance between the human world and the demon world.
no subject
"HOORAY!"
She has the happiest smile ever as she babbles at you.
"If Uncle Otoha is already dead, then that means he is a zombie! And zombies don't age, so Desco will never outlive you!!"
She flies in several tight spirals, apparently spinning around for the sheer joy of it.
"Desco is so HAPPY!"
no subject
I'm not sure if I really died or not, but yeah, I don't age. I don't have access to my full power here, though.
At home, I think the only thing that can kill me while my contract is active is another Karas, and that won't happen unless the will of the city decides I'm not fit for the job anymore. That's how I got this job - Eko kind of went insane and wanted to wipe out all the humans.
no subject
"Uncle, uncle! When Desco is a beautiful and mature woman of 2100, you'll still be around, right? When Desco brings home a boy, will you threaten him so he behaves properly to Desco?"
SO EXCITED.
"Desco will even buy you a shotgun so you can sit in the living room and clean it ominously!"
...wait a second, did she say...twenty-one hundred?
no subject
Hopefully I'll still be around, yeah. And of course I will. And I don't need a shotgun, I've got a sword.
[... He is okay with this.]
no subject
"Big Sis needs to hurry up and arrive here! Desco knows she'll love you as much as Desco does!"
no subject
[Because he could use some help managing all this adorable.]