[Video] || [Filtered to anyone that has a girl-like name] || [DEFINITELY filtered away from Pit]

[pistolsakimbo]

[Rune's looking a little uncertain at the COMP, not entirely sure she set it up right. It's a moment before she sits back, still looking like she wasn't sure she should be doing this.]

So... um... I'm not trying to say I don't know what a date is...

[Okay, she really doesn't know as well as she'd like, if the fact that she just turned beat red is any clue.]

...but, uh... what do you do on one?

Comments

[voice]

[forceofnature]

It's simple, really.

You establish a mating court first, creating a saucer-shaped depression in the ground about, oh, 10 meters in diameter. Make sure you construct it next to a sheer rock face of some sort so you can amplify the mating calls. From there, you 'boom' for about eight hours or until a member of the opposite sex arrives - they might have to come from a few kilometers away, so it could take a while.

Fluff your feathers - spread your wings and make sure you walk backwards. If your mate likes you, you'll hear clicking noises of satisfaction.

Then you have intercourse really quickly for about 2 minutes and never see each other again.

[Video]

[ineedthemforanalyzing]

((Permissions posts work mutually, right?))

[forceofnature]

.......What?

Oh, come on, she couldn't possibly have been asking about human dating. All you mammals ever do is sit around awkwardly secreting pheromones until you mate.

[voice]

[pistolsakimbo]

...WHAT?!

[forceofnature]

It's not always about humans, you know! Kakapos have to find dates, too!

It's not like you're asking for practical reasons, right? You'd just be opening yourself up to way too much potential humiliation from the peanut gallery.

[pistolsakimbo]

I-I'm asking for dating advice for me! Not for some... whatever those are!

[forceofnature]

...Did you not hear what I said about the peanut gallery?

Fine, whatever. You sit around releasing pheromones and rub your tongues around to sample them and test if you're biologically compatible.

[pistolsakimbo]

[...she's getting the impression you're not the best source of advice here...]

Uh... right.

[forceofnature]

Oh, and remember to hold hands. Physical intimacy gets the blood pumping.

[pistolsakimbo]

...hold hands, hunh...

[...well, holding onto him during Halloween wasn't so bad...]

[forceofnature]

Soooo.

Who's the lucky male of reproductive age~?

[pistolsakimbo]

Hunh?

[Sorry, mental images...]

Oh, his name's Pit...

1/3

[forceofnature]

2/3

[forceofnature]

[forceofnature]

...............
............
.........
......
...

Angel.

Has wings.

Can't fly.

Super huge dork?

[pistolsakimbo]

...how many other Pits are out there?

[...if only she could ever know.]

[forceofnature]

You. Enjoy. That. Date.

[Suddenly all of Hinoto-Ri collapses in a 9.0 earthquake on the Richter scale. ...Alternatively, the voice and the presence dissipate instantly.]

[pistolsakimbo]

[...what...?]

Sheesh, what was that about?