No, that's a filthy lie.

I just can't and or don't and or don't trust you enough to tell you the real reason.

[Some people would add "yet" on there; but some people aren't jaded assholes. Santa is.]

It has something to do with the number three, I can tell you that much for three.

[Do you get it? Do you? Dear god he misses his lame pun making almost friend right now. He'd be in hysterics.]