[ 3 ] [Audio - text]

[getoutclaus]

It's your friendly neighbourhood Santa Claus here, guys.

I just wanted to know if anyone wanted to form a team for dealing with any situations that might pop up - I heard there was an attack a while ago on a lab, right? If anybody wanted to, I dunno, prearrange to join up and fight evil and all of that glorious shit in the name of justice.

I already have two team members, so that makes a total of three of us, and I myself am a support Persona user and I've got some real expeirnece in that field.

[Santa rolls a few thoughts about in his head before he continues.

He wonders if Junpei and Snake will be aware that they're already being counted as his teammates, but surely they wont have a problem with that, right?]

All I ask of you is that you give me a few piece of information, yeah? Don't worry 'cause it's nothing intrustive and you can filter, lock, encrypt or encode the fucking shit out of it so long as you tell me at least how to read it.

I'll include the information I need at the end of the post, alright?

[And the audio feed ends there.]


Name:
Occupation:
Persona Type:
Personality type (in three words or less, thanks):

Comments

[epicbraille]

[ Doing his best faux-offended voice over here. ]

You don't need any information from me, Santa?

[getoutclaus]

Nah, not really. I know the stuff about you that I asked, more or less.

[Can you even read the four or so questions he asked, dude?]

You feelin' left out?

[epicbraille]

It's only natural. Usually I'm at the heart of your schemes.

[getoutclaus]

Well I already know your information, alright? So you're already included.

[WAIT A SECOND]

Don't call it a scheme, man! You'll make people think I'm some kind of slimeball!

[epicbraille]

Now, now, settle down. Not all schemes are bad.

[ The Second Nonary Game was, though. No two ways about it. ]

[getoutclaus]

[Wait; the second one was bad or a scheme? Be clear, man.]

You mean like a get rich quick scheme?

[epicbraille]

Sort of, although those schemes don't have a great reputation. I was thinking more like a pension scheme.

[getoutclaus]

Aren't you a little young to be worrying about a pension scheme?

[Hang on where did he put his privilege?]

[epicbraille]

Aren't you a little old to believe in Santa Claus?

[getoutclaus]

What, you never acted as Santa Claus for Clover?

[epicbraille]

Nope. I had my hand full with other matters growing up.

[getoutclaus]

Hand full.

[The laugh is silent but they both should realise it's there.]

Well no I'm not too old to believe in Santa Claus haven't you ever heard a christmas story in your life?

[epicbraille]

[ He realises. ]

And I'm not too young to be thinking about pension schemes. Knowledge is power, Santa.

[epicbraille]

Ah...perhaps I should've said forewarned is forearmed instead.

[getoutclaus]

Maybe you should just put the arm statements to the side for a second.

[Or turn a blind eye to them.]

Anyway, do you want me to ask the questions?

[epicbraille]

No, I'd bet you want to know my name and a little about my Persona. Since you already know those things, asking would be a waste of time.

Although it sure is nice to be in a situation where we have time to waste, wouldn't you say?

[getoutclaus]

I guess so, but a waste of time is a waste of time no matter what you do with it.

[God dammit Snake this is why nobody went looking for you when you died because of annoying shit like this! Don't pretend to be bothered if you weren't oh my God.]

How're you settling in to a new place, anyway?

[epicbraille]

[ Woah, is Santa showing some concern? Alert the media. Fake concern or not, Snake can't help but smile. ]

Well enough, well enough. I've spent enough time in my apartment that I won't walk into any tables any time soon.

[ He has been going for a walk at least once a day, a little bit further each time, in order to get a feel for the city. ]

The other day I took a trip to the library, as it happens.

[getoutclaus]

I'll take your table off your hands if you want, then you don't have to worry about it.

[Blink blink blink blink...]

This place has Braille books?

[epicbraille]

[ Hand. ]

It does. I was able to pick up a rather hefty book on Egyptian mythology, as it happens.

[ Just a bit of.

Just a bit of...

Light reading! ]

[getoutclaus]

So I guess you get blind demons and shit too, huh? That's interesting.

But why the book on the Egyptians?

[epicbraille]

Demons and blindness aren't mutually exclusive. Shabriri is a demon from Hebrew mythology who blinded those who drank uncovered water. Probably a story made up to stop people doing just that, when you stop and think.

[ The wonderful world of information you didn't ask for, with charming host Snake. ]

I got a book on Egyptian mythology because I'd like to know a little more about my Persona before I have to use it.

[ He laughs a little. ]

I'm sure they'd have 'Twas the Night Before Christmas, if you'd like to do the same.

[getoutclaus]

Ha ha ha you sleigh me.

[Somewhere out there Junpei is jelly as fuck.]

Bu wait; why the fuck would they want to stop people drinking uncovered water? That doesn't even make any sense!

[epicbraille]

[ Snake could launch into a tl;dr rant about the Talmud Bavli and how it warns against drinking uncovered water in case of snake poison followed by death, and about the cultural connections between the Talmud and Shabriri...but instead he'll cut it short and just go with: ]

Because it could be dirty.

[ Duh. ]

[getoutclaus]

Oh... I guess that makes sense.

[He just assumed it would be some kind of sinister reason.]

People did get blinded from drinking dirty water though, didn't they? I mean along with the other stuff that could happen to them.