compnetwork | 02 [Text]

[Bro is bored. Real bored. Not that he misses the insane hectics from the Medium too much. Nah, it's his old life that he misses. His apartment, his stuff, his brother... Lil Cal's a great bro, but there's nothing like your own flesh and blood bro.

Either way, a bored Bro is a Bro who's prone to pulling ridiculous stunts.]

ATTENTION EVERYBODY!!! its time for a pop quiz!

you didnt study? dont worry. there is no studying. this only needs common sense. better hope youre not a total idiot.

get all answers right and earn yourself a fabulous prize.

1. coca cola or pepsi?
2. boxers or briefs? (if you are a lady or like to wear ladys underwear: thongs or briefs?)
3. is the pen mightier than the sword? motivate your answer.
4. how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
5. whats the airspeed velocity of an unladen european swallow?
6. cats or dogs?
7. why is the grass green?
8. so youre sitting in a diner drinking your coffee and suddenly you look out the window and see bigfoot robbing the bank across the street. what do you do?
9. 3 + 3 x 7 - 19 / 4
10. if a tree falls in the forest and theres nobody around to hear it does it make a sound?

no cheating! anyone who answers the first question with diet anything will be taken out back and shot.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

2. i insist that you give it another shot. i fucking insist. you aint leaving until youve added more muppets to your life. in fact. were marathoning. im starting you off with the first movie. then manhattan. then christmas carol. then maybe treasure island.
9. must be a new rule. or some otherworldly thing. pretty sure thats not how it worked when i was taught.

[It's all lies. but go and prove him wrong, why don't you?]

Aragami - the Devouring Gods. Apparently the country that used to be Japan was where they first surfaced, so we use their name for the things.

Also, it doesn't seem like dog is eaten around here, so it's probably just my world.

...oh. People. Yeah, lot easier to kill a person if you aim for the throat.

[Well.. That was one way to start a friendship.]

2. I'm guessing that's not an offer anymore. Oh well, it'll give me something to do and meet more people.
9. Oh? I guess mathematical processes change over the years, so it isn't strange to think that you were taught differently. Not to mention the teacher also makes a difference too.

[Oh, she's falling for it. Sweet. It's the perfect crime.]

2. your place or mine? gotta give you a fair warning. my place is such a big mess i might lose track of you between the mountains of soda cans and dirty laundry.

[Don't even start with crime]

2. It might be better to come to mine then, but I'm new here so I don't have a lot of belongings yet.

2. you got a couch, a tv and a dvd player?

I think so.

[A moment later, he gets another text.]

Yep. I do.

2. then youve got all you need. its a date!

the names bro btw. bro strider.

2. Athena Cykes. It's nice to meet you, Bro.

ditto.

gimme a time and place and ill be there.

How about 7? I live in , Pisces 09-09.

ill be there.

you still want dinner or are we moving straight on to the movie?

Hmm... It might be good to eat first...

[Athena.... you rely on emotions and feelings... How are you not bothered by how this is becoming a "date"? ~~Even though it's not. xD~~]

ill bring pizza.

Sounds great. I'll go get some pop.

[He's sigh at the grammar in general but at this point he just rolls his eyes and kids these days.]

It's a particular brand that I made for agents in the field. A class three grenade.

Excuse you?! I'm not an 'arrogant hipster' I'm a rock star!

Besides:
3 + 3 x 7 - 19 / 4
This shit's basic math. First you do the multiplications and divisions:

3 + (3 x 7) - (19 / 4)

3 + 21 - 4.75

Then the rest!

19.25

[And that's how far he got.]

That's weird. Where did you get that?

3. Yes, but assuming both are being used by the same person, that person would get more power out of the sword.
8. His legs, I'd try to disable him so he can't fight.

1. Like the ones that aren't brown. I don't know what that is either.
3. I think sword, then.
5. I don't know what the question meant to begin with.
8. I'm stronger than you'd think.
10. Some of the ones in Wonderland talk, so, I'd go there to figure out the question.

1. uh. you know the color aint always an indication of the taste right? like. you could get a clear soda that tastes like a brown one.
3. why sword?
8. fists? medium-sized sword? kick in the nads?
10. yeah? you can take a quick holiday down the rabbit hole? set me up with your travel agency cause i want in on that.

3. ok fair enough.
8. A+ gold star. thats the best way to tackle bigfoot.

i MADE it with my own two hands lil missy. see the superb stitching? took me years to perfect.

i didnt say youre an arrogant hipster. i said diet sodas make you one. leave it to arrogant hipsters to make it all personal.

wtf since when do multiplications and divisions come first. are you shitting me. im gonna get in touch my old math teacher. i feel like my whole life is a big fucking lie.

[Ironically, the alternate universe kid version of Bro has a much better sense of grammar. Bro himself just can't be bothered to put that much effort into his typing.]

you made a fucking pen grenade? for real?

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